Keepind SALT alive in me; dumb, it's urgent!

I need a lot of time to grabs and to understand the essence from my experiences as coach of CLC. What could I do as a person to reveal what I believe on thinking and working into doable activities that inspire others of beauty of life and beauty of understanding.  No longer work as a professional on reproductive health, population and gender it makes me uneasy somehow. I almost forget that I personally Salty and able to learn and work on the new issue and new circumstances, but in fact I feel unsatisfying with my self.  there must be a mistake what I believe.  what is that.  Why I feel useless in this new job and position? I contribute nothing!

One day, groups of students invited me to accompany them to develop plan of action after they finished one session of training. I felt on fire and spirit-full since I will speak in front of people and inspires them with my experience and skill to develop output base planning. I told them what should and should not they do as a counselors.  At almost two and half hours all audiences were in silent listening to me.  at the end of session they worked in a group and develop three months action plan. Every body were happy with that process. As well as me, but then ooopss...why I'm not happy with my new job? should I become a preacher first and telling people what should they do to make me feel a success and make me happy? there must be something wrong with my thinking.  What is that?

For almost three months I learned DRR - disaster risk reduction - from my team members.  I kept listening and tried to understand every single words and concept they shared.  They developed terms of references of various activities we initiated and I shared the terms of reference to our implementing partners.  All run smoothly until one day I feel that my capacity of listening was lessen.  I felt unconformable because I need to be listened and in the same time I have no sufficient knowledge and skill on DRR to be shared.  My initiative is inappropriate still.   it made me down, really. However, in another side of my hearth and thought I believe that I am SALTY enough to cope with this situation. What make me uneasy?

When I write this blogs; I just remember one think, to be a couch is not about presenting SALT and CLC on the class room session.  Listening is the peak of SALTINESS it self, and I forgot it since I was wrongly perceived that need to be listened means to be considered as the only sources who can influence such a condition.  For me, to be well informed about one issue is a must that enable me understand what is understanding. The new issues should be digest first before it becomes my new knowledge with which I can share.

I found my own formula, even not new I believe, but it rings the bell on me: listening - warm-heart - modesty - digest - understanding - sharing - then transformation into more happy person.

Greeting from cloudy Bandung - Indonesia

With love

Wiwin

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Comment by Olivia Munoru on March 7, 2013 at 6:01pm

Wiwin, I think that your experience resonates with many people. We all need to feel validated at points in our lives, but as Jan says, the best validation comes from within. What was it about sharing CLCP and SALT that makes us feel so alive? How can we stimulate this within all the work we do? I have seen you in action - you bring a room to life and stimulate people to think differently about their situation. This can be done in any circumstance, any room, any people, any situation. 

This is what is the beauty of the SALT way of working - it can be transferred to anything!

Comment by Jan Somers on February 6, 2013 at 1:36pm

Your story very much resonates with my feeling  - this feeling of: "What is my added value in this life? Why are things not flowing as smooth as I would expect? Although many people say they become inspired by things I ask or say. It feels like being in-between and maybe that is what brings the discomfort within me. Maybe I should have no expectations at all? ... but then this self-talk is not very salty. Stimulation: too much I suppose do I get stimulated by other people, by concepts or ideas that trigger people into action not just words; Appreciation: I need to learn not to depend on the appreciation from others but learn to appreciate who I am with all my deficiencies and talents; Listen, Link and Learn : I listen easily to others, giving them all my ears (although my ears are sowly deteriorating) but I do not listen enough to my inner Self I suppose. Linking to others has been my source of energy and wisdom and but sometimes I feel the balance unbalanced. Yet linking is thé way forward. Learning is something that starts in life from day 1 (or maybe even before) it stops on the last day of life I suppose. Learning new things can give me so much joy and it gives me stuff to share as well. Transfer: sometimes the transfer goes easier than in other times - I need to explore those moments in the past when the transfer of 'my lessons learned'  went well.

 

So, triggered by your blog entry, it gave me the opportunity to stand in my mirror as well. Thanks !

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