Reflecting on my SALT conversations

[Kasthuri Divya]

Rituu B. Nanda has been guiding me and my colleagues on the SALT methodology, encouraging us to incorporate more SALT conversations. For me, the conversations happen naturally, when I suddenly think of SALT & wonder ‘What would be a positive, more curious response?.’ While I can often identify strengths and genuinely appreciate them, expressing appreciation occasionally feels awkward, disrupting the flow of the conversation. In my role as a facilitator, I don't aim to convince individuals of their strengths in one conversation, as I don’t believe I can change their attitude/point of view in one conversation; so I’m not sure how such a change occurs in the person. This leads me to question whether my primary role is to identify strengths or to provide support in building autonomy for individuals to recognize their strengths.

Considering factors that influence my conversations, I've observed that my gender plays a significant role in encouraging other women to share comfortably. However, in a work context, there's a hesitancy to engage in similar conversations with supervisors or senior colleagues, as it feels challenging to have normal interactions with them.

What worked well was the ease of initiating conversations with people who knew me on some level, creating a sense of approachability. Familiarity, especially with friends, family, and acquaintances, facilitated a natural flow in conversations without a specific goal. However, when interacting with colleagues, there is a fear of appearing too informal, which might affect the types of questions I ask. Reflecting on these interactions, there are instances where I refrain from sharing to avoid interrupting the other person's flow, fearing that the dialogue encourages them to share more.

In some instances, appreciating felt so out of place in the kind of relationship we shared, breaking the rhythm we had followed for so long. It made me question if I appreciated that particular quality authentically. Engaging in conversations with colleagues who are older, senior, or in management positions proved challenging to the extent that I eventually stopped attempting such interactions. I think the only way to work with that is to slow down and find opportunities to make contact without having a specific goal to have a conversation.

Regularly reflecting on experiences, identifying what works, and recognizing one's values and strengths are essential. In conclusion, learning and practicing SALT involves navigating the dynamics of familiarity, formality, and authenticity across relationships.

[Sneha Farzana]

Yes, I think we should first develope our contract with others and then we may approach them in a conversation in a very regular conversation way

[Rituu B. Nanda]

Your conclusion stands out in my mind. Food for thought! Thanks Kasthuri