“The Village Belongs to the Youth: The Wisdom of Elders, the Energy of Youth, and the True Meaning of Masculinity”

[Shahrukh Atpade]

When I went into a small lane to conduct a SALT activity, I noticed a man sitting outside his house on a chair. I approached him and asked, “Brother, do you have a little time? I would like to talk with you.” Without a moment’s hesitation, he invited me inside. We sat down, and what followed was a very meaningful conversation.
I often conduct SALT conversations, but today’s experience was different so different that I felt I must write it down. Through this encounter, I truly understood the essence of hard work and perseverance.
He told me that he grew up in the Dr. Sarvepalli Radhakrishnan Child Welfare Home, a government institution where orphans, semi-orphans, or children whose parents cannot care for them stay until the age of 18. His father had passed away, and his mother could not manage the responsibility of six children, so he was admitted there. After some time, he was shifted to another institution where schooling was compulsory.
Life in the children’s home was very different — there was always enough food for breakfast, lunch, and dinner, but there was no one to give love or affection. He studied up to the 10th standard and then returned to his village. Because of family responsibilities, he started working with a bulldozer — first as a cleaner, and later as a driver. This work gave him the chance to travel to almost every state in India. Every 2–3 months, he would take a 15-day leave and return home.
His monthly salary was only 90 rupees. Out of this, he would send some money home and use the rest for his personal needs. Many times, due to lack of money, he had to travel by train without a ticket, constantly living with the fear of being caught by the ticket checker.
When I asked him, “Where did you get the courage to endure all this?” he replied, “When I was in the children’s home, our textbook had a lesson called ‘Education for Self-Reliance.’ It taught us to stand on our own feet and to be honest. That lesson has stayed with me throughout my life.”
He added, “Back then, villages had less money, fewer jobs, but people were content.”
From this conversation, I learned something important — human beings automatically work hard to survive and overcome challenges, but often fall short when it comes to their way of thinking.
When I asked him about today’s youth, he said, “Now, there is no longer the same love in families. Parents and children do not understand each other. Just as I overcame hardships and moved forward, today’s children are not able to do so.”

Finally, he expressed a profound truth:
“The village belongs to the youth. When the wisdom of elders and the energy of the young come together, the village moves forward.”
His words filled me with new energy. Today’s experience became one of deep insight. People are often afraid of facing difficulties, but those who confront them head-on are the ones who truly bring change.
After this, we spoke about masculinity. I began by saying, “You and I are men. And we too have emotions.”
I asked, “What does it mean to be a man? Who do we call a man?”
He replied, “A man is the head of the household. His responsibility is to go out, earn money, and provide for the family.”
He went on, “A man’s heart is heavy. Earlier, men used to cry a lot after the death of their parents. But today’s youth do not cry at all. It feels as though they have no love left in their hearts. And when a man does cry, people say, ‘Why is he crying like a woman?’ Crying is only an emotion, but society does not allow men to express it. A man cries only when he is alone, never in front of others, because he does not want to be seen as weak.”
“At the age of 40, many men lose the will to live. Because in their youth, there was no one who truly understood them, and gradually they lose the desire to go on.”
“There are so many thoughts, so many feelings inside, but whom should we tell? That question always haunts me. I always think that I too should share my feelings with someone.”
I asked him, “Would you like to share your feelings with me?”
Without hesitation, he said, “You are the age of my son, but until today, we have never had such a conversation. We never talked like this. But today, by speaking openly with you, I feel so much lighter. Being a man is truly difficult. If God were to ask me in the next life, I would not want to be a man again. But today, I felt no fear in expressing my emotions.”
This experience touched me deeply. I realized that men often suppress their feelings, carry heavy burdens, and when they cry, society judges them as weak. But when given a safe space to express themselves, they speak with honesty and openness.
I came to feel that true masculinity is not about suppressing emotions, but about shouldering responsibilities while also having the courage to express one’s feelings.

[Shahrukh Atpade]

Santi rambari thank You for reading...!

[Santi rambari]

I always learn something from reading your writings. I gain new experiences. Thank you.