Responsibility, Respect, and Love: Gaurabh’s Definition of Manhood

[Nityam Ghosh]

Hello friends! I hope you all are doing very well.

A few days ago, I had a meaningful conversation with a 20-year-old young man named Gaurabh Oraon in the Nichhe Line area of Bhatpara Tea Garden. This dialogue took place during a SALT session focused on the topic of “Masculinity.” What I learned from this conversation truly touched my heart and gave me fresh insights to share.

Discovering the True Meaning of Masculinity

Through our talk, I recognized several beautiful qualities in Gaurabh. He is always ready to help anyone facing problems in his community. He treats every person as if they were family, showing kindness and respect. Gaurabh is hardworking and maintains a positive, open mindset. Above all, he is a genuinely kind-hearted and good human being.

When I asked him what he feels when he hears the words “man” or “male,” Gaurabh described masculinity as a sense of responsibility, protecting family and community, courage, self-confidence, and the willingness to work hard and face struggles. He sees a man as the main pillar of the household, someone who demonstrates respectful and ideal behavior.

Hidden Feelings of Responsibility

One of the most moving parts of the conversation was when Gaurabh shared something he usually keeps hidden. In his family, with three siblings and hardworking parents employed in the tea garden, it is tough for them to manage daily life and education. Gaurabh dreams of working hard to secure a good job that will make his parents proud. He carries this deep sense of duty silently in his heart and hesitates to share it with others.

Lessons Learned as a SALT Facilitator

From this conversation, I learned that true masculinity goes beyond just oneself. It is about working for the well-being, respect, and strength of others. Embracing one’s weaknesses and moving forward with courage is also part of being a man. Gaurabh’s story inspires a richer, more compassionate understanding of masculinity—one that blends strength, sensitivity, duty, and kindness.

Reflection on the Session

What went well in today’s session? Gaurabh enjoyed discussing masculinity from a fresh perspective and appreciated the chance to express his thoughts openly. Our prior acquaintance made the conversation comfortable and free from hesitation, which he valued.

What could have been better? Gaurabh said that if his dream of making his parents proud had already come true, revisiting the questions would have been even more meaningful. He also felt that the session could have been improved with more young men joining, so diverse viewpoints could emerge.

This SALT session with Gaurabh was a wonderful opportunity to deepen our understanding of masculinity and the values it can embody—values that embrace community, responsibility, and heartfelt compassion. Such conversations bring us closer, helping us grow stronger together.