Understanding True Masculinity: A Heartfelt Conversation with Wahid

[Nityam Ghosh]

Today, at the RURAL AID organization, I had a deep SALT session with my dear brother and colleague Wahid, discussing masculinity.

At the beginning of the session, I had an in-depth SALT conversation with Wahid. During our discussion, I witnessed many strengths and positive qualities within him:

* A deep sense of responsibility towards his family and community

* The ability to listen openly and understand others.

* The courage to express his emotions and thoughts honestly.

* A natural tendency to help others and inspire them.

This session was not just an exchange of ideas but also an opportunity to learn from each other and for self-reflection.

How do you feel when you hear the word "man" or "male"?

Wahid shared his perspective on what being a man means:

* Taking responsibility

* Remaining resilient in tough situations

* Keeping up courage

* Being brave

* Never giving up

* Having faith in the strength of family

* Taking care of and nurturing the family

What are the things that make you feel like a man but you hesitate to share with others?

He responded that earlier, in society, whatever a man said was final in the family, as he was the one caring for the family. But he never imposed this in his own home. Rather, he always warned his family in advance if something wrong could happen and explained things with detail. However, at home, his partner does what she feels is right, and this sometimes hurts him emotionally.

As a SALT facilitator, I encouraged Wahid to recognize his inner strengths. Wahid then said that after talking with me, he realized that every person has their own ideas and feelings. When differences occur at home, they should be resolved with love and understanding. He is proud that his family always stands by him, and together they can overcome any difficulty.

Key Learnings from Wahid’s Conversation as a SALT Facilitator:

Being a man is not just about being tough; it’s also about caring for the family.

* Along with courage and bravery, understanding emotions is important.

* Differences in the family should be resolved with love and wisdom.

* Family unity is the true strength of a man.

* Every man has his own ideas and feelings, which should be respected.

AER (After Experience Reflection)

What went well today, and why?

* It was deeply connected to my life, so I felt truly good.

* It made me happy from the heart that you brought questions for me and encouraged my thinking.

* I appreciated that such questions created an environment for reflection.

* I got a chance to understand myself.

What could have been even better today?

* If I had experienced such conversations earlier, perhaps my family would have developed a better understanding of society and relationships.

* I realized that controlling myself is in my hands, but trying to change others can lead to being judgmental. Controlling one’s behavior and attitude is important.