Responsibility, Pride, and Masculinity

[Shahrukh Atpade]

The relationship between a father and son is very unique. A hardworking father is always in front of his children’s eyes. Children usually see their father working all the time. After becoming a father, a man dedicates his life to giving his children a happy and secure future.
Today’s visit was very special for me. I visited a house where both the father and his 28-year-old son were present. I had already done a SALT conversation with the father earlier. Today, I felt happy to see both generations together. When I asked them to remember and share the good things from their lives, both of them started thinking and then speaking.
The son spoke first. He said that when his father had an accident, he was in 10th standard. After the accident, the responsibility of the house came on his shoulders. At that time, he started working in a medical shop and managed both his family responsibilities and his education. He continued working until he completed his graduation. With the money he earned, he supported his family and paid for his studies. While he was sharing this, his father was listening with tears in his eyes.
Then the father said, “After my accident, I was not able to do anything. But my son took all the responsibilities of the house, and even now he continues to do so. I am very proud of him.”
After this, I connected the discussion to masculinity. The son said that when the responsibility came to him, at one point he wondered, “Why only me? Why didn’t my elder sister take responsibility?” But after her marriage, she went to her husband’s home. When he used to sit alone, he often thought about this. However, society expects that in such situations, the man should take responsibility. There was social pressure on him. Today, when he looks at his father sitting in front of him, he feels strong and decided not to give up but to fulfill his responsibility.
The father also shared his thoughts. He said, “In our time, the man of the house was considered the head of the family. No matter how difficult the situation was, he had to fight and face it.”

At the end of the discussion, we took AER.

They said, “Because of today’s discussion, I could openly express my feelings towards my father. I feel very happy after this conversation.”

Such discussions should happen between fathers and sons.