Rediscovering their own capacity

[Rituu B. Nanda]

Shristi and I did a SALT visit to village Aarandada, Kisaki district, Pokhara, Nepal with UNICON team under the ARC initiative. Seventeen women from the mothers’ group joined the conversation. Intention of the SALT visit was to help the women recognize their own potential.

During group conversations, I was in a small group with Regina and three women from the community. At first, the women struggled to name anything remarkable they had done in their lives. Yet as we listened, we realized how much they do every day. Many of them wake up at 4:30 am in the morning and work until 10 pm at night. They care for their children, manage their homes, work in the fields, and tend the animals. Despite this, they still felt that they were not doing anything significant. During the conversation we observed their close relationship with nature, with the land, animals and crops. One older woman said proudly that she was very skilled in rice plantation. Another shared that when she cuts grass for the cattle, she carefully chooses the best grass for them to graze. Even after these conversations, the women still said, “You are an NGO. You can help us and provide something for us.” When we gently asked what they could do themselves, knowing that outsiders are present for a short time with minimual influence over others, they replied that even if we did something for a short while, later they would try to find solutions.

Later, when we returned to the larger group, the women began sharing the strengths they noticed in each other. As they spoke, their confidence slowly grew. They shared efforts they had made in the past. For example, they wanted to build a community centre where they could meet regularly, but they did not have enough funds. They spoke about their pain. As they belong to a particular caste, they experience discrimination. Even in meetings there may be a separate water container for their caste members. Caste continues to be a barrier when they try to access opportunities.

When we came to the closing and asked what next, the tone shifted. One woman said that they appreciated UNICON's bringing them together and reconizing their strengths. The woman opened up because UNICON facilitators also shared. The woman encouraged other women that it was time to do something for themselves. Another woman happily offered a room in her house for the group to meet. 

This visit reminded me that community-led work takes time and patience. It involves unlearning. As facilitators, we are constantly unlearning and relearning the basics: listening carefully, appreciating what people already do, and learning from their lived experience.  Communities, too, have their own unlearning to do. They have grown accustomed to outsiders arriving with answers. Reclaiming confidence in their own abilities and potential also takes time. I conclude with an intention that this community will take of its life.