Masculinity Rooted in Humanity: A Village Elder’s Wisdom on Being a Man

[Nityam Ghosh]

In a recent SALT session held in a village, I had the privilege of speaking with Shri Saibu Gowala, an elderly community member whose life embodies the true essence of humanity and responsibility. Through our heartfelt conversation, I discovered inspiring lessons on masculinity, community service, and the power of dreams.The Heart of a Helping Man Shri Saibu Gowala is a living example of compassion and dedication. Known for his readiness to help others, he holds a special place in the hearts of village residents, especially children, toward whom he shows deep care and affection. He listens attentively to the problems the community faces and devotes himself to finding practical solutions. His life is guided by strong human values—humanity and cooperation form the foundation of his existence, weaving a strong bond within the village community.Defining True ManhoodWhen asked what comes to his mind upon hearing the word "man," Shri Gowala responded with a wisdom carved by years of lived experience. To him, being a man means being responsible—responsible not only for the family’s peace, happiness, and care but also for the wider community. A man must live harmoniously with others, earn his livelihood diligently, and fulfill his duties honestly, whether within the family or the village. He emphasized that men must step forward to help whoever is in need, to resolve conflicts, and to support families or individuals in distress. This, he said, is the core essence of manhood.Unspoken Dreams and AspirationsA touching part of our dialogue came when Shri Gowala shared something deeply personal—something he had never revealed before. He spoke of his suppressed dream to study, become educated, and serve as an officer in the Indian Army. Due to challenging family circumstances, this dream remained unfulfilled, and he carried it quietly in his heart. His greatest hope became to see this dream realized through his children or other village youth. While his son did complete college, he took a path different from what Shri Gowala had envisioned. Despite this, Shri Gowala remains hopeful that young people from his village will serve both the village and the nation with dedication.Reflections on the ConversationReflecting on the SALT session, Shri Gowala expressed how meaningful it was to finally share his innermost thoughts and feelings. For years, his dreams and emotions had been kept hidden, and being heard gave him great comfort and happiness. He felt truly inspired by the open dialogue.When asked what could have improved the session, he wished for more villagers to participate, sharing their own dreams and challenges. He believes that this openness would foster greater understanding, positiveness, and unity in the community, making such conversations even more powerful.Lessons from Shri Saibu GowalaThis conversation brings forth important lessons for all of us: the strength of a community lies in the humanity and responsibility each member carries. A man’s true strength is shown not just by fulfilling his personal responsibilities but by uplifting those around him. Shri Gowala’s life and words encourage us to listen deeply, support each other, and keep alive the dreams that connect us across generations.This blog captures the spirit of Shri Saibu Gowala’s inspiring outlook on masculinity, community, and the power of shared dreams. It reminds us that open, heartfelt conversations are vital for building strong, compassionate societies.