Learning Beyond Facilitation: A Reflection on Child Marriage

[Sandhya Bhandari]

Today, during a community visit, I had the opportunity to talk with a young couple who had married at an early age. They are only 20 and 23 years old and already have a child studying in playgroup. As I listened to their journey, I realized that behind every smile, there can be a story of sacrifice, struggle, and unfulfilled dreams.

The wife shared that she was studying in Grade 12 when she fell in love with her cousin. An unplanned pregnancy led them to marry early to protect their child. As a result, her education came to an end, and the dreams she had for her future were put on hold. After marriage, her husband went to Japan for employment, leaving her to raise their child and manage the household alone. Even today, they have not completed their legal marriage registration, and their child also faces documentation challenges.

One thing that touched me deeply was their honesty. They openly shared that if they had understood the responsibilities and challenges earlier, they would have waited until they had completed their education, become financially stable, and built their careers before getting married. Their reflection was not about regret alone—it was about learning from their experience.

As a community facilitator, this conversation was meaningful for another reason. During my first individual SALT visit, the wife barely spoke to me and even refused to take a photograph. Today, she shared her life story openly. It reminded me that trust is not built in a single meeting; it grows through patience, respect, and genuine listening. That was one of the biggest lessons I took away from today's visit.

I am also part of today's generation, and this conversation became a lesson for me personally. It reminded me that love alone is not enough to build a life. Before making life-changing decisions such as marriage, it is important to be emotionally mature, complete our education, develop our skills, and become financially prepared. Being aware of the responsibilities that come with marriage and parenthood can help young people make informed choices for their future.

Today's conversation reminded me that every story carries a valuable lesson. As facilitators, our role is not to judge people's past but to listen, learn, build trust, and support them in creating a better future. At the same time, as young people ourselves, we can learn from such experiences and make thoughtful decisions that protect our education, careers, and dreams.