World Men’s Day: A conversation that highlights the emotions behind masculinity

[Shahrukh Atpade]

On the occasion of World Men’s Day, we held a SALT and masculinity focused discussion with a group of young men, adult men, and elders in Nandwal village. This day is celebrated around the world, but this year we chose a slightly different approach. Instead of the usual practice of offering flowers or praising men just for a day, my intention was to create a heartfelt space for understanding their emotions, experiences, and everyday struggles through meaningful dialogue.

The conversation began with a simple activity. Everyone shared one memorable moment from the previous week some spoke about laughing and spending time with family, others about enjoying dinner with friends, and a few mentioned the relaxed evening chats with friends at the village square after returning from work. From this discussion, it became clear how important these small, everyday joys are in men's lives.

When asked about Men’s Day, they honestly said that the day feels no different to them; it doesn’t feel special, and many weren’t even aware of it. I then gave them a brief introduction about Men’s Day and created a safe space for expressing emotions. This naturally opened up a deeper discussion about masculinity, encouraging men of all ages youth, adults, and elders to share their experiences openly.

Many important reflections came forward. They said, “Being a man is not easy” society expects men to be strong but rarely understands them. Even today, at the village level, men constantly carry the burden of family, work, farming, and social expectations. The youth shared how growing up, family conditions, education, and income pressures all pile up silently. “Every night while sleeping, my mind is full of next day’s tasks, and the morning starts with the same long to-do list,” said one young man. Many agreed that emotional needs, mental stress, and exhaustion are often suppressed, because society expects men to always remain ‘strong.’

However, the SALT conversation created a rare space where they expressed these feelings openly for the first time. Everyone realized that this was a safe place to understand and support each other. The three generations youth, adults, and elders listened to one another, leading to deeper mutual understanding. All agreed that masculinity is not just about responsibility; it is also about sensitivity, care, self-time, and contributing positively to the community.

Towards the end, the group decided that next year Men’s Day should be celebrated not just as a formality, but with more meaningful activities focusing on men’s mental health, emotional well-being, and mutual support. The idea of holding small group discussions every month in the village also came up. This conversation, reflecting on men’s everyday experiences, silent struggles, and the search for positive masculinity, became an important milestone for the entire group.

As a facilitator, I learned that men speak more openly and honestly when they are in a group setting. I will always remember this day because this was the first time in my life that I celebrated Men’s Day after being born as a man.